Questioner:

May Allāh reward you: What is your advice to a married couple who are growing apart from one another and one of them is unhappy in the marriage due to this-it seems apparent that it is the wife- and they have children together – may Allāh bless you?

Shaykh Arafāt al-Muḥammadī:

We must firstly look at the reasons for this. Why has this husband become distant from you as there may be some reasons on your part. There may be some shortcomings, a lack of care or a lack of attention because in most cases, a man becomes distant from his wife if he doesn’t feel he is being adequately attended to and the woman is the same, she becomes distant if she doesn’t sense there is adequate attention. 

However, there are times when a person becomes preoccupied, the wife may be busied with looking after the children and the husband may be busied with work and attention from both individuals may dwindle. In this case, people must be patient and keep this in mind and it is encouraged to remind each other of this. Swiftly distancing from each other without having patience with one another is wrong! Both of you should increase in supplicating to Allāh for there to be love, mercy and purity in the marriage because supplication has a great effect. But you should look at the reasons. Avoid any reason that causes distance, avoid any reason that annoys the husband and if you are wise, avoid anything that annoys the wife.