HomeArticlesIs Aisha Invited too? – Honouring One’s Spouse and Refined Social Conduct

Is Aisha Invited too? – Honouring One’s Spouse and Refined Social Conduct

A refined Prophetic example illustrating compassion, honouring one’s spouse, and exemplary social conduct, as explained by Imām al-Nawawī in his commentary on Ṣaḥīḥ Muslim.

The Prophet ﷺ disliked being singled out for food without her.

Anas ibn Mālik (d. 93 AH / 712 CE) reported that the Messenger of Allah ﷺ had a Persian neighbour who was skilled in preparing soup. One day, he prepared soup for the Messenger of Allah ﷺ and came to invite him. The Messenger of Allah ﷺ asked, “And is ʿĀʾishah invited as well?” The neighbour replied, “No.” Thereupon, the Messenger of Allah ﷺ said, “No,” declining the invitation.

The neighbour returned a second time and invited him again. The Messenger of Allah ﷺ again asked, “And is ʿĀʾishah invited as well?” He replied, “No.” So the Messenger of Allah ﷺ again said, “No,” declining the invitation.

The neighbour returned a third time to invite him, and the Messenger of Allah ﷺ again asked, “And is ʿĀʾishah invited as well?” This time, the neighbour replied, “Yes.” Thereupon, the Prophet ﷺ and ʿĀʾishah went together until they reached his house.

Yaḥyā ibn Sharaf al-Nawawī (d. 676 AH / 1277 CE) commented regarding the second narration concerning the story of the Persian that this incident relates to a separate legal consideration. It is understood that there existed a valid excuse which removed the obligation upon the Prophet ﷺ to accept the invitation. In such circumstances, the Prophet ﷺ had two permissible options: either to accept the invitation or to decline it. Since ʿĀʾishah was in a state of hunger, or in a similar situation, he chose to decline the invitation unless she was included.

The Prophet ﷺ disliked being singled out for food without her. This insistence upon ʿĀʾishah’s inclusion falls under the category of noble conduct, fulfilment of spousal rights, and recommended social behaviour enjoined by Islam. Thus, when she was permitted to attend, the Prophet ﷺ chose the second permissible option for the sake of a greater benefit. That benefit lay in honouring his wife, perfecting good character in his dealings with her, and showing compassion in the situation that had arisen.

Reference

Anas ibn Mālik (d. 93 AH / 712 CE), Ṣaḥīḥ Muslim, Kitāb al-Ashriba, Bāb Istihbāb Ijābat al-Dāʿī wa Jawāz al-Iʿtidhār, ḥadīth no. 2037.

Yaḥyā ibn Sharaf al-Nawawī (d. 676 AH / 1277 CE), al-Minhāj Sharḥ Ṣaḥīḥ Muslim ibn al-Ḥajjāj, Beirut: Dār Iḥyāʾ al-Turāth al-ʿArabī, 2nd edn., 1392 AH, vol. 7, p. 87.